Mom met a man at a dance. His name was Bent Bjerrim. After the dance, Bent drove Mom home. He told her he was from a town called Esbjerg and he was here visiting a friend. He wanted to know if it was okay to call her the next time he was in town. Mom liked him, so she gave him her phone number.
When Bent came over, Mom would send Sander and me outside to play. When this picture was taken, Mom was so eager to get rid of us that she sent us outside in our underwear.
A stranger came by and took our picture. A few days later, he came back and asked Mom if she wanted to buy it. When the stranger left, Sander and I got yelled at for letting a stranger take our picture.
Mom and Bent started seeing each other more often. Whenever Bent was in town, he would stay with us. Sander and I started to look forward to Bent’s visits because he gave us attention and candy before we were sent outside to play.
Sander had told Mom that our dad got a new girlfriend. On weekends, Mom let me go too.
I’m guessing it was because Mom was hoping it would scare Dad’s new girlfriend away.
When Dad came to pick us up, he brought his girlfriend. He introduced me to her. Her name was Henny. He told us she had moved in with him. She was 10 years younger than Dad.
Now the visits with Dad were a little different. When Sander and I woke up in the morning, we would always jump into bed with Dad and lie there for a while before he got up and made breakfast for us. Henny was not happy about us hopping into bed with them!
The following Friday, when we came for our usual visit, Henny gave us some comic books and put us in the bedroom. She told us to read them and keep quiet because they had company over for dinner and didn’t want us to bother them.
Sander and I soon got bored looking at the magazines. Sander tried to get out, but the door was locked. After a while, Dad came into the room and asked us what we were doing. Sander told him, Henny had locked us in. Dad got upset with Henny and told her never to do that again. I was glad Dad stuck up for us!
The next morning, when Sander and I woke up, we hopped into Dad’s bed just like we always did. This time, Sander started looking around the room, then asked, “Someday will Søs and I inherit all this stuff?” Dad laughed and said, “Yes, I suppose so.” Sander told me what he expected to be his. I didn’t want him to think he was going to have it all, so I spoke up and told him what I wanted.
Before we knew it, we had divided Dad’s possessions in half. All of a sudden, Henny got angry and started yelling at us. Dad told Henny to calm down because we were just kids and didn’t mean any harm with what we were doing.
The following weekend, when it was time to visit Dad, he called us. He had something he was doing with Henny and couldn’t get to us until Sunday afternoon. Then we would spend a few hours together.
Since we could not spend the weekend with Dad, Mom brought both Sander and me to church. This Sunday, the teacher taught a lesson on swearing. My dad swore a lot, so I swore too.
When I was little and in the baby carriage, I would yell out swear words I knew. People would look into the carriage and seem amused by seeing such a little person trying to swear.
As I grew older, it didn’t seem to be so cute anymore. The teacher told us Heavenly Father didn’t like it when we swore. I couldn’t wait to tell Dad about this lesson. I was sure he would be so impressed that he would never swear again!
When Dad came to pick us up from church, he brought his new camera that he had just bought. He took some pictures of us while we were there, intending to sell the group photos to the children’s parents and to the grown-ups present. He was always looking for the opportunity to make a few extra kroners.
When Dad came to pick us up, I told him all about the lesson. Dad told me there was no such thing as God, and therefore, it didn’t matter if you swore. Besides, anything the Mormons taught us was garbage and not to listen to it! I was confused and frustrated. I wondered why the teacher would give us this lesson if it weren’t true.
The following weekend, we spent with Dad and Henny. Henny showed me a dress she had sewn for me. I thought it was the most beautiful dress I had ever seen! I fell in love with it instantly! I couldn’t wait to put it on. Dad fixed my hair and even put a bow in it. I felt so beautiful in it and wore the dress all weekend. When I got home, I couldn’t wait to show Mom my new dress!
When we got home, I proudly showed it to Mom. She got angry and yanked it off me and pulled the bow out of my hair. Then she said, “It’s the ugliest dress I have ever seen. It looks horrible on you! You are never to wear it again!” I pleaded with Mom not to throw it away. I told her I could bring it to Dad’s, and I would only wear it there. But she would not hear of it. She then threw my dress and bow in the garbage. I was devastated!
Wednesday, June 29, 1966
Mom had some vacation time, so she decided to fly to Esbjerg and spend some time with Bent. While she was gone, Sander was going to stay with Dad, and I was going to stay with some church members.
I asked Mom why I couldn’t stay with Dad. Mom told me it was because Dad didn’t want me there, and I fought too much with Sander. I promised Mom I would be good, but she just ignored me.
I would be staying with a family Mom knew from church for the week. I was familiar with the family because whenever church got boring, I would start running up and down the aisle. A man named Sønderby would grab me and hold me on his lap while he drew pictures for me. He helped me sit still during church and made the time go by faster.
Sønderby and his wife had a boy my age named Kim. Kim was an only child, so he was excited to have someone to play with.
Even though I would much rather have been with my Dad, Kim and I still had a fun week together.
Mom was looking forward to spending some time with Bent, but she was nervous about flying. She had never been on a plane before. On the plane, Mom sat next to a man. His first name also happened to be Bent. His full name was Bent Ramsdahl. He was 33 years old. He told Mom that he had lived in Canada since he was 18.
Bent was going to Skive to visit his parents. He had missed his flight because he had fallen asleep, and this was the last plane departing for Skive that day. Bent made Mom feel at ease as they flew. When Mom got off the plane, Bent asked her for her phone number and her address. Mom gave it to him, thinking that since he lived so far away, he would never call or write her.
When Mom arrived in Esbjerg, she spent the next few days with Bent Bjerrim. Bent told Mom he lived with a roommate. While she was visiting, Mom got suspicious, so she asked Bent’s roommate if this was really where Bent lived.
The roommate admitted to Mom that Bent was only pretending to live there while Mom was visiting because he was married and had a baby boy. Mom packed her bags and went back home.
She then called Bent and told him she didn’t want to see him again unless he divorced his wife. Bent told Mom he loved his wife and had no intentions of leaving her. That was the end of their relationship.
Thursday, July 28, 1966
Bent Ramsdahl called Mom from the airport to let her know he was on his way back to Canada. He had to wait 9 hours before his plane left, so he wanted to know if Mom would come out to the airport to visit him for a little while.
Mom was in the middle of painting the living room, so she wasn’t able to go to the airport. Bent asked if she would mind if he wrote to her. Mom told him that would be fine. Bent asked if she would write back to him, and Mom told him she would.
When Bent returned to Canada, he sent Mom a postcard with his address on it. Then they wrote letters back and forth.
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