Sunday, January 14, 2001
The Bishop called me into his office to see how things were going, so I told him. He said the adversary is working overtime on families. It was important that our family stayed together. It would be best if we could work things out. He could refer me to a marriage counselor. I let him know that I had seen enough counselors to last me a lifetime! He said to let him know if I changed my mind.
The Bishop has no idea what Richard is like behind closed doors. I figured I would just have to endure and trust that our eternal marriage would be perfect in the next life. I kept praying for the strength to endure to the end.
Wednesday, January 31, 2001
Monday evening, when it was time for bed, Sarah started to cry. I asked her what was wrong. Sarah is 13 now and is usually such a happy, content girl. She told me that she didn’t want to go to school anymore. Some kids at school were bullying her.
I kept Sarah home from school yesterday and today. I feel so bad for her because she is such a sweet girl and can’t defend herself.
There are two other kids Sarah’s age in our ward who are being homeschooled because they were having a hard time as well. They are the same age as Sarah. I talked to one of the moms and asked her about the program they were using. She told me the program costs $300.00 a month. Because two kids were doing it, it cost them $150.00 each, and if Sarah wanted to join them, it would be $100.00 per student per month.
I talked to Sarah about the program. We were both excited about it.
I talked to Richard about it. He said, “Jared had a hard time when he went to middle school, and look at him now! It would be good for Sarah to toughen up. It is part of life! There is no way that I will pay $100.00 a month when she can be going to school for free!” I said, “I will pay for it with my babysitting money.” He said we still couldn’t afford it because the money I was making had to keep going toward groceries and necessities. I told him there had to be a way! But he wouldn’t hear of it!
Every fiber of my being wants to go against what he is saying. He is the head of the family, so I need to be obedient.
I went to Sarah’s school and talked to the principal about the boys who were bullying her. They assured me that they would take care of it.
Over the years, I have cried so many tears over sending her back. If I could only go back in time!
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