Monday, November 7, 1977
I am still getting letters from Nick as if we never broke up. Today I got a letter from him telling me he has moved out of his parent’s house, and he was waiting to get baptized because he wanted me to be there. He pleaded with me to give him one more chance to show me how happy he could make me. He said he wasn’t going to give up on me because he loved me too much. I never wrote him back. I hoped he would get over me soon and move on with his life.
Saturday, November 28, 1977
Mom asked Bent if they should clean out the attic and get rid of some of his parent’s clothes so that they could use the room for Elisabeth and I. Bent got upset. He wants things left the way they have always been. It’s like he is waiting for his parents to return. The house is so very drafty and you can tell it is winter, but Bent does not want to put in new windows to help keep out the cold. Mom tried to tell him that he would save money on heating the house but he will not hear of it. It is obvious to Mom that Bent is not going to change anything about the house, so she is looking for an apartment for us to move into.
Thursday, January 5, 1978
Mom found a new apartment and we moved in today. It was nice to have hot running water again. The first thing I did when we moved in, was to take a long, hot shower. I knew as long as I lived, I would never take hot, running water and flushing toilets for granted!
Elisabeth doesn’t seem to mind that her parents are getting divorced. I don’t think she fully comprehends what is going on. Elisabeth is excited about having her own room, hot running water and a tolit. After I was done with my shower she took a long hot bath.
Friday, January 6, 1978
This morning, Laila and a few other classmates came to pick me up for school. Before we left, I showed them our new apartment.
Thursday, January 28, 1978
Mom has started a new business. She is making a lot of money. She works out of her apartment. Life is so much better now. Mom has also found an apartment for Grandma Helfred and arranged for her to come to live here in Skive. Her apartment is not too far from where we live. The only thing I am wanting now is to find my dad. I don’t want to accept that I will never see him again. I began praying that somehow, we would find each other.
Monday, February 28, 1978
Mom is starting to act toward me as she has always done in the past. I don’t mind helping out with chores, but she wants me to do everything. I am already going to school and work a lot of hours. I try to keep up, but what Mom is expecting of me is impossible! Mom got upset with me for not being able to do all that she has asked. If mom and I worked together we could do it, but she says she has too many book orders and has to take care of for her business.
Monday, March 6, 1978
Mom has complained to Mina, her visiting teacher, about her housework, so Mina came to help her get things caught up. It takes Mina one-half hour by train to get here. After Mina had done this a couple of times she realized she was going beyond the call of what is asked of a visiting teacher. Since mom couldn’t get Mina to keep coming back she got upset with me again. No matter how much she gets upset, I still can’t get it all done!
Monday, March 13, 1978
Mom has hired a maid. She told me I am to pay for what she does. I told Mom I didn’t think it was fair. She told me, I owed it to her since I won’t do anything around here. It was not true, I did a lot, but I knew it was no use arguing with her. Then she added, “Consider it rent for living here.” It’s quite a lot she has asked me to pay. More than what she is paying the lady she has haird. I tell myself that at least I still have some money left over.
Monday, March 20, 1978
I bought a beautiful green dresser with my own money. Since my room is in the attic, the window in the ceiling is right above the dresser. When I got home from work I saw my window had been left open. It had rained, and my dresser was soaked. The green stain was partly washed off and dripped onto the carpet. My dresser looked terrible and so did the carpet! I asked Mom why my window was open. She told me it was the maid. I had already told Mom that I didn’t want her in my room, especially since I am keeping it clean! There was no reason for her to go in there! Before I knew it, Mom was yelling at me. Here I am– the one with the ruined dresser and somehow, I’m the one in trouble. It just makes me so mad to think it’s my money she is using to pay the maid. I don’t understand her!
Tuesday, March 28, 1978
I am still getting letters from Nick regularly. Today, I got a letter letting me know he was getting on with his life. He didn’t want to tell me how he was doing, because as he put it, he didn’t think I would care. He wanted me to know his life was a puzzle and I would forever be the missing piece. He also wrote it had been nine months since I left, and if I ever changed my mind he would always be there for me because he would love me forever. I never wrote back. I am glad he finally accepted that we were done and that he was getting on with his life.
Saturday, April 8, 1978
Elisabeth was in my room and saw my wallet lying on my table. She picked it up and saw the picture of my dad. She wanted to know who the man was and why I always carried this picture. Mom had told me I was never to tell Elisabeth that we had different dads. Elisabeth had caught me off-guard, so I said, “It’s Dad.” She responded, “What do you mean, Dad? He looks nothing like dad!” I didn’t know what to do because I didn’t want Mom to get upset with me. I said, “Yes, it does! He was just really young in this picture. It was taken before his hair had fallen out.” Elisabeth looked at me as if I was nuts, but to my relief, she didn’t question me any further.
Friday, May 19, 1978
Today is the last day of school. This morning the students played soccer with the teachers. I made the first score! Later we sang in the streets. It’s a tradition for the students who graduate to sing to everyone. That was a lot of fun. The Danish people know a lot of songs by heart. It’s part of the culture.
Later in the day, I had to hurry home. I had to get changed and get to work on time. After work, I hurried home again to change so I could meet up with my classmates who were having a farewell-to-school party. When we were done eating, there was a dance.
Wednesday, May 24, 1978
Now that school is out, my boss says I can work full-time. I should get an education but I am too scared to try. I have been made supervisor over the dish-washing area and I am making a lot of money so I figured I should be content.
Mom told me that because I was working full-time, she had laid off the maid and I would have time to do all the chores now. I asked if this meant I didn’t need to pay rent since the maid was no longer here. Mom said, “No, you need to pay more rent.” When she told me the amount I was shocked. I talked to a co-worker about it. She told me for that amount Mom was asking, I could afford to rent my own place and still have a lot of money left over. She showed me some ads in the paper so I could see what it would cost to live on my own. It sounded exciting. I wanted more than anything to have my own place, but I am scared of how Mom will react if I were to do that.
Thursday, June 13, 1978
In Denmark, you start school in first grade, when you are seven, and you go to the same school with the same teachers and the same classmates until grade 10. When you have completed grade 10, you can go on to college.
All the students in 10th grade got tested today to see if we could get our graduation certificate. I was nervous since I have such a hard time with spelling and math. I wasn’t sure I was going to graduate.
We have all been given nine books to read because they were going to test us on them as part of the graduation. I misunderstood and I thought I only had to read one of the books. All the students waited in the hall and we were asked into a room one at a time to be tested. While Laila and I waited for our turn, Laila asked me if I had read all the books because she knew I had such a hard time with reading. I told Laila I thought we only had to read one of the books. Laila said, “No, it was all nine. Wow, I guess you are not graduating today!”
When it was my turn the teacher picked one of the nine books. It just happened to be the one I had read! I had a hard time answering the questions because it had been so tough for me to get through the book. In the middle of the questions, the teacher told me she knew my mom. My mom was very well-known in the town because she owned her own business and was very well-liked. All the other teachers joined in and wanted to know how my mom was doing. Instead of questioning me on the different subjects we spent the rest of the time talking about my mom.
When our interview was over they told me, “Congratulations, you have graduated school!” To top it off, they even told me I graduated with a high score. I was so excited! I thanked them and went back into the hall where the rest of my classmates were waiting. Man, was I glad that the teacher just happened to pick the only book that I had read! When Laila was done, she asked me what my sore was. I told her. She got upset to find out my score was higher than hers. Laila said, “That’s not fair!” She went and talked to the principal about it. It didn’t make any difference. Here Laila had read all nine books and her score was lower than mine, all because the teachers happened to know my mom. She was right, it wasn’t fair. I was just glad I had graduated!
Sunday, July 16, 1978
Grandma had lived through World War II. For Grandma wasting food was unthinkable…
I turned 17 a little over a week ago. I was sitting in church next to Elisabeth, who is now 6 years. and my Grandma Helfred.
A missionary who was serving in our branch had been asked to give a talk on chastity. While the Elder stood at the pulpit he got out an apple and started to peel it. He proceeded to cut it into pieces with a knife. The Elder put the apple slices on a plate and handed it to the congregation, as he asked them to touch the apple.
It’s a small branch of about 25 people. When all the members had a chance to put their hands all over the cut-up apple slices, the plate was handed back to the Elder.
The Elder then asked, “Is there anyone who would like to eat this apple?” Everyone in the congregation said, “No” except Grandma.
Grandma went up to the pulpit took a piece of apple off the plate and proceeded to eat it. Grandma didn’t want to look selfish, so she held up the plate and asked if anyone else would like a piece. Everyone looked mortified at Grandma as they reassured her that they did NOT want any of the apple. Grandma then said, “No sense in letting a perfectly good apple go to waste.” She went back to her seat with the plate of apple slices.
She sat down and started to munch on the apple. Grandma turned to me and tried to hand me a piece of apple. I pleaded with desperation in my voice to please leave the apple alone and give the plate back to the speaker. Grandma ignored my plea and turned to Elisabeth and said, “It’s a really good apple, wouldn’t you like a piece?” Elisabeth (being young and innocent) looked at the apple and grabbed a piece. Elisabeth and Grandma sat there together crunching on the apple slices as they looked up at the speaker, waiting for him to continue his talk.
The Elder stood there in disbelief. Then he said, “Well I was going to make a point about chastity and how…oh….well….oh… I don’t quite know what to say, because I didn’t expect anyone to actually eat the apple.” It looked like the Elder was at a loss for words, and since he didn’t know how to continue his talk, he sat down.
I just wanted to die. I couldn’t believe what had just happened. I was extremely upset with Grandma!
My grandmother has since passed away. I still rememeber how mortified I was that day. Now I can look back and laugh. I believe that Heavenly Father has a sense of humor and I am sure he had a good laugh that day.
Wednesday, November 1, 1978
Mom told Elisabeth and me that she wanted Sander to come live with us. She had sent him a ticket and he would be coming this Christmas. My first thought was maybe he could help me find our dad. It was going to be the best Christmas ever!
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