Saturday, February 16, 2008
Richard left to do some errands. When he came back, he told me he had been to the bank because now was a good time to refinance our home. He said he had already done the paperwork, and all I had to do was go back with him to the bank and sign my name.
I asked him if this was necessary because as soon as Bent’s house was sold, we would have enough money to pay off the house. Richard said that since we didn’t know when that would happen, we might as well refinance our home now to get a lower interest rate.
It made sense to me, so I went with him to the bank, just like I had the other times when he told me to sign papers for the same reasons.
When we got to the bank, the teller gave me the papers to sign. In the past, without looking at them first, I had just signed them as asked. This time, I started reading them.
When Richard saw that I was trying to read what I was signing, he got upset. He put his hand down on the papers, so I couldn’t see what I was reading. Then he angrily looked at me and asked. “Why do you need to read the papers?! Do you not trust your OWN husband?!’ I got nervous and confused. I was just going to see how much we still owed on the house and how much lower our interest rate was.
Richard assured me that if I had any questions, he would gladly explain them to me when we got home.
Richard seemed agitated. I thought it was because he thought I didn’t trust him. I apologized and signed the papers so that he would calm down.
When we got home, I asked Richard why he was so happy. He said it was because we were able to lower the interest. I believed him.
In 2020, I found out I had signed for a $150.000 loan on the house. I also found out that over the years, I had signed my name on other loans. It ended up being a total of $450.000.
The original load for the house was $142.129.82. When I found out just how much was added onto it, that was hard for me to deal with. Don’t know if I will ever get over it!
Saturday, March 1, 2008
I have been asked to interview candidates for kitchen positions. I didn’t mind. The hard part was training them. People never stuck around for very long. Training new people seemed endless.
I wish I didn’t have to worry about all the bills we have because I would much rather stay home and be with my kids!
Monday, April 14, 2008
Bree is still abusive towards the rest of the employees and me. She didn’t know I had been documenting it.
I talked to some employees in other departments and asked them if they would mind telling me what Bree had done when she was their manager. Everyone was eager to tell me about it.
I typed up everything. I asked the hospital’s main manager for a meeting. All the employees knew about the meeting. They wanted to be there to verify what I had documented was true and to make sure she got fired.
Wednesday, April 15, 2008
We had our meeting today. Bree and HR were there as well. The kitchen staff had asked that I be their main spokesperson. It was scary, but I didn’t let it show.
In the meeting, when Bree saw all the documentation I had on her, she realized she was likely to be fired, so she said, “Before this meeting goes any further, I want to say that I am resigning!”
We were all relieved to hear that. After the meeting, all the employees thanked me for everything I had done.
Part of me felt bad for Bree. But I am glad we won’t have to put up with her verbal and mental abuse anymore!
Friday, May 30, 2008
Ever since Bree resigned, I have been doing her job. I told the manager that since I was doing a manager’s job, I should get a manager’s pay. I was told that since I didn’t have a manager’s degree, I would have to settle for $12.00 an hour. Then I was promised they would hire more people.
I had to send out emails to different managers in the hospital. It was part of the job. Since Bree was no longer working there, I couldn’t use her account. I was asked to use my personal email because it would take the IT guy time to set me up with a work account. I didn’t know much about how that worked, so I figured there was no harm in using my personal email.
My cousin in Denmark had told me about Facebook. I didn’t really know much about it, since it was new. After reading his email, I thought it would be fun to join. When I accepted the invitation, it asked if I would like other people to join. I didn’t realize it would send an invitation to everyone whose email address I had. So I hit yes.
After that, when I would see the different managers in the hall, they would either smile at me and say, “I am not sure what it is you have invited me to, but I would love to be your friend.” Other managers would assure me that they were happily married and therefore they had declined what I had invited them to. I would apologize for sending them an invitation and tell them that I didn’t really know what Facebook was about. I only joined to see what my cousin in Denmark was up to. It was so akward!
I would again ask for a separate email account and was told that they were going to hire a new manager any day now.
Sunday, June 1, 2008
I was starting to understand what Facebook was about and the possibilities of finding people I knew. I was at work, writing out everyone’s work schedule for the next few weeks.
Sundays are always slow at the hospital. Since I was at the computer anyway, I thought I would go on Facebook and see if I could find Per. 3 people had the same first and last name. None of them looked like him. One of the Per’s that had come up said he grew up in Skive.
I looked at the picture. It didn’t look like the Per I used to know, but I thought I would send him a private message and ask. I asked if he was the Per I knew from back then, if so, if he remembered me.
A few days later, he responded to my message. He wrote that he was the Per I once knew. He added, I remember you, how could I forget?! You meant a lot to me and hurt me deeply.
I wrote back and told him that I was sorry for hurting him and that he had meant a lot to me as well. I wrote that I should have told him back then that I was a Mormon, and therefore, I set a goal when I was young that I would marry a man who was also a Mormon.
In our messages back and forth, he told me he had 4 children, one of his daughters was named Sarah. I told him I also had 4 children and a daughter named Sarah.
It was nice to get reconnected with him, but since I was married and he was in a relationship, we stopped messaging each other. But we still remained friends on Facebook.
After finding Per on Facebook, the dream I often had of him finally stopped.
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Ever since Bree resigned, I have been the manager and have been supervising. It’s been 3 and a half months now. I was told they would hire an assistant. Since I was getting the job done, they were in no hurry to hire more people. I was only getting 3-4 hours of sleep a night.
I was working 7 days a week, 14-16 hours a day. I had no days off. Plus, I was still homeschooling Johny when I got home in the evening. I was burnt out!
Because of all the overtime I did, I have been able to pay off all the bills.
I put in my two weeks’ notice. I was told they valued me as an employee and asked me to stay. I was told the hospital would pay for me to go to school so I could get a degree in management. Once I got the degree, they would pay me a manager’s salary. I thought, why would I need a degree when I was already doing the job?
I thanked them for the offer but told them I needed to be home with my kids.
Besides, they weren’t in a hurry to hire more people. I thought, how do they expect me to still work and go to school? I had loved the job, but I was glad to know it was coming to an end so that I could finally get some sleep!
After I had quit, I went back to visit with some of the employees in the kitchen. Ever since I stopped working, they have hired 4 more people. It bothered me at first that they hadn’t hired more people while I worked there. Then I realized it was my own fault for taking on so much. I enabled it. However, I was grateful for the overtime, even if it almost destroyed me. And best of all, we were out of debt. Not realizing I had enabled Richard’s spending sprees as well.
Sunday, August 30, 2008
Now that I am no longer working, Richard has been so nice. He makes sure we go on dates every Friday evening. He does all he can to go above and beyond being nice to me. He keeps reassuring me that he loves me and that he has repented for all the gay thoughts he has ever had.
Richard said, “You are the only person for me! You are the only one I could ever love!”
I don’t love him anymore, and if I could do it over, there’s no way I would marry him! I am just glad he is being nice. It makes it easier to endure to the end.
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